Sunday, February 27, 2005

time wasted

i feel very so guilty... i wasted my time after my three consecutive tests with interval of 2 hours each.

hmm... as expected, the programming result is out.... i got 19 out of 26... gosh... it is definitely under expectation... one more to go... yah...

my goal was to get the first digit of the marks "2"... argh... just one more question answered correctly i could achieve that.... sigh... yah... it is not that easy... if i were studying so hard, as what i did for those few days before programming test.... i could definitely have done better... perhaps, a few more, say 2 or 3??? =p hee hee...

really hard to tell... what if i got lower, would i feel even worse....

anyway, i do not feel good for my physics test.... it was quite awful that i could not recall the formula that needed to be used for the questions i was trying to solve... sigh... i spent a lot of time in revising and memorising those long and tedious formula... however, the method does not help a lot... i think i need to come back to traditional way, ie to do a lot of excercise on each topic... i still have half a semester's time to catch up!!!

alright... dont not waste time on things are not necessarily done or can be done some other time... i need to set the priority very clearly... otherwise, i will suffer... =(

hee hee.... just try and do my best...

bring all out...

t.c

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Saturday, February 26, 2005

a day which shall not be forgotten

Today is another day which definitely shall not be forgotten...

it has been taxing for me right before and after today....

coz today i had THREE mid-term tests: c programming, electrical engineering and physics, wow... it sounds very taxing right???

yah.... it is... the impact does not end right the 3 tests were over but lasts for a quite long time... hopefully till the time that i left the examination hall after my last paper of this semester.

why?

oh... hm... coz i have to arrange everything to review, in the meantime, i have to keep learning other modules which do not include mid-term tests but they do take me a lot of time in doing their assignments and "projects"....

wow.... MC is a new challenge to me... i am sure i will make a good HR... however... i dont know how to start... =p hehe.. perhaps my standard of word is too high??? who knows... i am always trying to be efficient... oh....

loads of things need to be done... k...

really missed my blog... he he... wow... it has been 5 days that i have not posted any entry...

k.... sure i will write a lot.... hopefully, i can make use my skills in crapping in my pp... ha ha...

alright...
t.c.
~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Monday, February 21, 2005

UCC again

u know what??

just now typed so long and i dont know what i did... all the writing has been erased...

argh... i feel mad now... i am pissed off....

why cant they design some ADVANCed system to protect the input...

i know that i am responsible for saving my own writing... it is not a good excuse to skip the hard work on it...


alright... anyway...

i was saying...

today our midterm break started... however, i have to spend most of my time for the first two days in UCC again... becoz of our hall cultual production...

it is fun experience however... i am not too professional yet... i think i am not patient and tolerant enough in accepting the time expenditure...

because i have told myself that i have a lot of things to do esp in catching up in my study...
i am doing it... however the pace is not very statisfying to myself... but my self-control for these days is really bad....

i have already spent two days to give myself a break from programming and critique writing last saturday and sunday...

bizcom has a chalet at hotel phenix and we had great time there... i enjoyed the debate and discussion we had and jokes and funny point people made... and not to forget the cOol, massage chaire... ha ha ... it was really great...

bizcom is a united big family.... i can see that the bond is much stronger than it was last year and we are going to build it more united and even stronger... act that we are really as one...

life is never easy... but there is no need to take it so hard on it...

thriving in difficulties is fun, enjoyable, enriching, exciting, memorable but it is also challenging, tough, and sometimes frustrating.... none the less, i am going to thrive again.... for my tests... for my projects... and more importantly, for my future... i cant just wait and see what is going to happen... i am very sure to say that i am not that kind of person most of the time... i am the kind that wants to make things happen and implement changes... i am very sure about it...

anyway, my point is that i will stay in UCC again... ah ha... still remember last sem that i spent all my midterm break in UCC... it was unforgettable... enriching...but kinda terrible experience... ha ha... ;p

alright...

"this too shall pass""...

let me thrive...

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Friday, February 18, 2005

continuity

guess what...
i just woke up two hours ago....
i had to sleep after keeping my eyes opening for more than 60 hours...

gosh...

it was the third night that i was working hard on my study... i felt that i had to....
this is only so little time i have now... in the daytime, i have a lot of things to do which interfere with my study plan... but i cant affford be left behind any more... i had to catch up...
what i could do is to sacrifice my precious time of sleep to really really work on my study...

i talked to my buddie online yesterday... i just realized the time has flown so fast that i have not noticed how fast it flew... he told me that shool would reopen next monday... oh... after so much hard work from last semester, my friends deserved a long holiday... but some how the holiday is just not very long... and time does not stop to wait for them to take rest... now they have to come back on study again...

fortunately, i believe they all had great time in the chinese new year holiday...

some went for tours... some met up with old friends to chit chat and catchup with one another...

i really feel that it is really a pity that i cant join their gatherings, conversations, and even tours.... hopefully, they can feel that how much i wanted to join them... if i were rich, i would fly back to have my chinese new year celebrated back home... if i had some more time, i would spend most of it hanging out with them.... there are so many things that i miss that i had done together with my classmates, good friends and 'new friends'...

perhaps... now... i have recovered to 80 percent of my healthy condition... that started having sentimental feelings again... nonetheless, the postitive attitude seems to begin recovering too.
i just wish this period did not last for such a long time...

i believe that my friends are enjoying themselves... those who need to go to another city/province to pursue their academic success... i wish them all the best and a safe trip back to school... those who are reluctant to leave their be-loved city... all the best and do go back home to visit parents often to make parents happy... they have been giving all they could have done for you... and it is now time to repay the effort and love the parents have devoted.

i wish i could stay near to my parents to visit time often... i wish i could cook for them as they always did when i was at home... i wish i could meet my friends so often as if we were living in the same neighbourhood... i wish i could have followed the syllabus of my study so that i do not need to catch up so much... i wish i could have practised a lot in my study so that i do not need to always refer to my notes to find out what the concepts and formula are and how to solve them...

i wish i could fly... so i dont have to walk so slowly to catch up with people who are running in front of me...

nonetheless... i believe i can fly... since i feel the strength is coming back to my body to every single cell...

i believe i can fly... coz being positive helps me to keep a ultimate goal in mind to fulfill my dreams...

i believe i can fly... however, flying needs support... which i am working hard on it...

take care!

believe you CAN fly...
~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Thursday, February 17, 2005

another night

gosh.. i had another terrible night of staying up to work on my school work...
this time it seemed a bit easier than the critique since it is programming... and the question is not that difficult yet...

i could finish on my own; however, it took me quite some time on the formatting and alignment.
Anyway, it was good experience in exlporing in C programming...

i realised actually, during the computer course c programming learning, we learnt a lot of useful codings which i did not see the function of it....

oh... gosh... i was not as energetic as i has been the night i was putting all my attention and energy on the critique draft writing...

oh... just a strike in mind, how come i seem not as happy as i was?

i could think everything that i do is sort of fun source... i do still have that kind of intuition in mind, but somehow i feel that i am losing it... i am quite afraid of losing the positive attitude and all that...

i need to work hard on everything that i need to do... The most important task now is to catch up with my study and prepare for the coming tests... in the meantime, do well in other things that interest me...

maybe i am too busy... i find time is really not enough to me...

i had this plan in mind is that i sleep once in two days... longer but more efficient...

sigh... feel time is really GOLD now...

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Monday, February 14, 2005

damn

i really want to say... "damn it"...

i am still suffering from writing the cirtique... it seemed that i found a little bit of the right direction... but i cannot stop from making one point...

it seems that my essay will be very lengthy... gosh... but the point is that i need to finish writing - write down whatever i am trying to... then... i can edit it... otherwise there is no way i can finish my essay...

argh...

another thing makes me feel so "damned" is that i missed the interview of the holiday committee again!!! oh... i was in dance practice... and i was practising so happily with /without the music and i forgot anything else but writing the critique... oh... no...

i messed up a lot of things...

i have not done any catch-up on physics and e.e....
i have not done further readings of the SS required readings...
I have not finished my programming lab and tutorial coz i stopped half way and started
working on the critique... which is for now more important than any others...
i have not read any textbooks...
i have not visited my good friends frequently...
i have not talked to my friends back home much... i feel so bad... it becomes distant... [no!!!]
i have not found extra time to finish all the things that i have not done...

DAMN IT...

i have told myself that it will be a long night today... meaning working... no sleep...

have to stay up...

perhaps, it is another test... my sickness caused the lack of time and energy to do such things...
it is time to manage my time and start WORKING on it...

do the best!!!

take it easy but seriously...


"damn it" but overcome it!!!

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Sunday, February 13, 2005

tired

i feel tired now...

dont know what i am tired for???
is it just physical tiredness or something more...

i am not very sure...
today i did something different... i went shopping on my own and i bought a lot...;p

shopping alone is not unusual... but it is just at this time of year and it is during the time i feel that i am suffering... perhaps it is a good exercise / excuse for me to relax ....

i am not so sure...

life is not easy...

tiredness comes quite often... just get a good rest and get on your way again...

nothing can stop it...:p

k...

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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tired

i feel tired now...

dont know what i am tired for???
is it just physical tiredness or something more...

i am not very sure...
today i did something different... i went shopping on my own and i bought a lot...;p

shopping alone is not unusual... but it is just at this time of year and it is during the time i feel that i am suffering... perhaps it is a good exercise / excuse for me to relax ....

i am not so sure...

life is not easy...

tiredness comes quite often... just get a good rest and get on your way again...

nothing can stop it...:p

k...

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Saturday, February 12, 2005

IHG05

hey...
today we had victory and glory in IHG... though it was not really on campus... but it did not matter...

there were hockey qualification games yesterday evening... (coz now it is 12 Feb already)
yah... from my point of view and also from what i observed how other people reacted, i believe we had victory and glory yesterday in male hockey...

we first agains the hall in orange colour...
we played very well... we were almost attacking throughout the entire game till the last few minutes when our opponents started striking "madly"... we had two goals but only one of the two was counted... it did not matter already... we won by 1:0.... ha ha...

our players really did good job... yes... guys... well done...

however, in the following 2nd game, we did quite well in defending.. .yah... we did not have many opportunities to attack... most of the time, we were defending... it seemed our players were playing with a negative attitude... however, i dont think so... i say we played smart.... yah... very smart...

the 2nd games started only a few minutes after we finished the 1st game... (green against orange)... our players were of course very tired... and to be realistic, we had won one game already... there should not be any difficulty for us to pass the qualification games... so... we did not have to fight so madly as what the white wanted us to be...

we did our best to defend and we did a pretty nice job... we only lost one during the messiest part of the game... and we kept the goal so tight and our opponent just could not get the ball into the little space of the goal. yeah!!!

if we were playing as what the white expected us to play, we would put a lot of energies and efforts into attacking and more running... so our energy level would definitely drop faster than it did... and i think our opponent has definitely better stamina... as the energy level dropped, we would not have that energy that we had to defend... so we might lose more, which could put us in a situation that our destiny would depend on the result of the other two opponents' game.

thus, we kept a good attitude which was right to keep low and do our best... yah... though it seemed negative... but it only seemed... the facts showed it was wise to do so... ha ha...

trying is always good... but not trying does not mean bad... sometimes it is just strategy....

i guess in the end the orange lost to the white more than 1 goal... coz by the time we left, the orange was losing by 0:1. he he....

the result is good... and we are all happy...

later... it will be the female hockey semi... i want to go... but hopefully, i can get up...
k...
good news is that we have gotten into the semis of hockey (both male and female)...
no news is that how the semi is going to be like...
expectation is that hoping for the best... the green can beat them all....
limitation is that how many people can go to support...

anyway... i'll try to make it...
however, i have the critique to write and loads of tutorial to do...

oh... pls... let me pass the phase of so much difficulty...

"this too shall pass"... i believe in it...

but i am going to try and do my best to the fullest... so that i can pass it without any regret...

keep upright...

take care!

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Friday, February 11, 2005

critique

oh... i am bothered by writing the critique...
it is the first time that i try to write such an essay...
it is kinda tough now...
i am still reading materials which i believe can help me generate some ideas on it...
oh... i have read the article several times...
it seems that i need to read some more to get the author's idea and stand...
i believe i am not an effective reader yet...
but i am trying to read more... :p
k...

have to get onto my bed and sleep now... tomorrow i need to do some catch up on electrical engineering... yah... i missed two lectures... which i believe the lectuer has covered a lot which i dont know where exactly he is lecturing now... i felt so bad that i messed up my study plan now...
sigh... i cannot put all the blames on my sickness... i could do better if i had a good plan...

i think i need to use my diary back now... i have not been using it for 2 weeks... yah... the period that i was seriously sick... alright...

really need to get off my computer now....

take care!
~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Thursday, February 10, 2005

the year of rooster

wow... it is already the 2nd day of the year of rooster...

i feel rather excited over the things i have done and the activities i am going to be involved...

Yeah!!!

hmm... however, there are some things really bothering me...

sigh... i just cannot get rid of it recently... perhaps, another 3 months are needed... oh... gosh... it seems quite long to me... coz it is kinda suffering... anyway, it is okay...

My health is getting much better now... i can take deep breath now... yah... i feel quite happy about it... the phlegm is getting less and my breath is becoming clearer... yo... man... cheers...

in the meantime, i think i am also benefiting... ha ha... coz i am losing a lot of weight... my pants suddenly got so loose... and they look baggy on me now.. ha ha... true... maybe the side effect of my sickness and all the medicine i have taken is loss of weight... ha ha...

kinda amazing...

alright...

yesterday was a great day... i started working on my critique in the afternoon finally...
then in the evening, i went out with three seniors for dinner....

since it is chinese new year season, everywhere seems so empty and quiet... finding a place to fill up our stomach seemed quite difficult... :p yah... most of the hawker centres have closed for these few days and quite a lot of restaurants are not open either...

anyway, there are always smart people who can spot the opportunity to earn more money in their business... it is to open their stall even others are temporarily "shut down"...

yes... the restaurant was crowded... and there were so many people queuing to have their dinner there... wow... i could see how busy the waiters and waitresses were... sometimes they were jogging all over the place... ha ha... kinda of busy huh?

yah... perhaps, they have made big profit... hmm...

but there is one thing disappointing... that is... the service is very slow... yah... true... i could understand them... limited manpower to serve overwhelming crowd... gosh... it was kinda tough though...

the food was quite nice... but due to the slow service, none of us was happy about the dinner... the slow service kinda swept away out appetite... and we were really hungry... plus we were also rushing for a movie... sigh... it was quite terrible experience... if we were not going to see the film, perhaps we would just sit down and relax to wait for the dishes to be served slowly... however, i am sorry to say that we were not in that mood... argh.... :p

anyway, the movie was quite okay... i found it a bit funny when it ended... it is "the phenix"....
maybe, the moral of the movie is to encourage people not to give up and try whatever they can do when facing difficulty... ?
anyway, the ending is kinda happy ending... the phenix flew the people back successfully... it was amazing... alright... i do not find it as a great movie... coz friends suggest watch "Constantine"... hmm... i will watch it....

...

when we were waiting for the taxi, we met a "couple"... perhaps they are just in relationship... the girl was really pretty... and the guy looked fine... but he does not stand straight... so he looked a bit hunchbacked... the girl was speaking fluent madarin, so we could tell she was from china too... anyway, that was not the point to make... hmm... perhaps, just one point to make, the girl was really pretty... =p... k...

p.s. argh... i am also looking for my valentine... when can the one appear?


~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Wednesday, February 09, 2005

am i

oh... i just realized that i talked too much to shake the bad thoughts out of my mind to keep myself happy...

i forgot... the bad things might influence my readers, if there is any... yah...

i feel sorry...

am i keeping a positive attitude when i blog??? ha ha...??

i think i did it... but after the outbreak of my continuous bad mood, am i blogging negatively?

i hope not...

blogging to me is to share... yah... not just pour out the sadness....

ops... herhaps it is because of my sicknees, i cannot be so happy over the period that i am sick...
sigh... anyway, if there is anything funny, happy and exciting, i would love to share here...

sorry dudes for being quite inconsiderate for these days...

i seek your understanding.... =p

auf wiedersehen...

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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cough

i was woken up by my own horrible cough...

i could not stop it... it was horrible... i could not sleep after that...

I took antibiotics immediately during the intermission... gosh... it seemed i could not stop forever...

luckily, the water cooler is just not far from my room... i quickly went out and got some warm water from it... i felt much better...

i feel very tired now... i want to sleep... but somehow, i dont want to do it anymore...

there is something around me that makes me feel uncomfortable....

i hung a pair of toy shoes on my bookshelf to get rid of the evil things and evil spirit from my room...

i am very sleepy... the thing is snoring... damn it...

so inconciderate... perhaps i said flapdoodle, i felt... coz i had bad nightmare i think...

argh... anyway, i can't stay up now... i have to take a rest...

......

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Tuesday, February 08, 2005

recovering

he he... the service of IBM is quite good...
I received the adapter yesterday morning... ON time...

Intuitively, I told the office about the delivery of my new adapter and left my number to them, so when the delivery man came the office phoned me and so did the delivery man.

He told me that I did the right and smart thing that I informed the office about it.. otherwise, he would just leave since there is no contact on the slip holding by the delivery man...

argh... anyway, i just got it at the promised time... i was quite satisfied...

however, i connected the adapter to the power cable. It still could not work probably. Then i conclude that the problem must be at the power cable... perhaps the protector (fuse, i guess) in the cable / plug is spoiled...

I thought that i had to get my laptop repaired before CHinese lunar New year...

therefore, i went to co-op personal computer service centre to seek help.

After queuing and waiting, the IBM customer service staff served me and helped me check where the problem occured. In the end, his judge proved my conclusion was correct... then, he just changed a new power cable for me... yah... i was very happy with it...

i also asked him to check my battery... coz i think the battery is dying... yah.... he had the same judgement over it, too... so... he promised to change the batter of my laptop... he he...

anyway, the stock was empty.. and i can get the battery as early as today... they will contact me... wow... i am gonna have a new laptop battery...

happy happy...

the morale of this story is that... do not forget to keep trying... you may get something good on one tree but you may not solve the problem/fulfil your dreams on the only tree. Herhaps, you can come down and try another similar path/way, in this case, climb on aother tree.. you mighg get more statisfied with it... however, you have to keep trying till the problem is solved or your dream is fulfilled. hmm...

life is like a battery... utilize it or you will waste it... =p

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Sunday, February 06, 2005

battery

The battery of my laptop is dying...
When i used it last year, the capacity then was around 40 plus Wh ( the unit that is presented in the battery information ).

Due to the failure of my AC adapter, I have to use my battery in order to use my laptop.

Disaster happened...

I found that my battery is dying... coz the current capacity is only about 20 Wh...

Apart from the life of my battery... it arouses my deep ponderer...

let me tell about the story about my battery...

I used my battery a lot when I first started using my brand new (at that time) laptop. Since I stayed in a hostel where I used it most, I seldom used my battery to supply the electric power to my laptop to run my laptop. What I did is that I charged the battery fully and plugged it out and placed it somewhere.

Quite sometimes, I needed to use the battery because I had to use my laptop where power supply was not easily found. Another reason is that I used the battery to serve the purpose of mobility and flexibility. It served and I was quite happy most of the time.

One thing to take note, it had been quite a long time since I first noticed that I needed to take good care of my battery. I read the battery tips given by the IBM help and I followed the instruction given there to recondition my battery once a while.

At the first few goes, reconditioning worked and I was really happy that the capacity of the battery had obvious increment. Since I did the reconditioning regularly, somehow I just forgot to check tips on other aspects, especially the tips on how to keep battery in good condition if it is out of the battery slot. I think I ignored that part completely...

So what I did is just leaving the fully charged battery out of the battery slot for days, sometimes even months.

Slowly I realized that the capacity was decreasing. I was quite worried and started focusing on the reconditioning of the battery again. I think I overdid it... the tips say that the user should recondition the battery once a month... however, I think I did it quite often... hmm... perhaps, twice a month or once a week... yah... it was bad for the health of the battery...

Just a few weeks ago, I noticed that when I did the reconditioning there was a sudden drop of the battery capacity towards the end of decharging. It was quite strange that it could suddenly drop from 42% to 5%. I thought I might be caused by the long period that i did not use back the battery. Now I guess, it is because I left the fully charged battery in such humid environment. I should have put it somewhere that is dry and followed the tips to leave the battery only less than 50% charged.

The sudden drop in the percentage of the remaining capacity happened again last night... i was very scared... another reason is that the laptop has shown the RED colour for the batter health.
The battery is dying not just discharging faster than it used to be, but also the capacity of the battery. In other words, the battery is at the end of its life....

Whan can I say about it?

To simply solve my problem, I can just request the customer service of IBM to replace a battery for me. Actually, I have called them. For today is Sunday, they will call back on Monday to tell me how they are going to solve my problem. In the meantime, I am still waiting for the new AC adapter. Hopefully, I can receive it tomorrow morning as they have promised. It is easy to solve the problem...

However, I do not see things just as simply as solving the problem... I do think over the problem...

Don't you think our life is just like the battery?

Think about the 1st few years of a person's life. The person's parents have had done their best or tried to do their best to take GOOD care of him/her.

As the person grows up, reconditioning is associated with the process of growing. Simply, it is because he/she has a lot of things to learn. Once he/she has learnt something, he/she will adjust, i.e. recondition him/herself. Take note, parents are still around to take care and guide him/her.

As years has passed, the person has grown mature/up. He/she has to lead his/her own life... Now, he/she might not be well taken care due to his/her busy career life and strenuous journey towards his/her success. That corresponds to the period that the battery that is left without good care. So the health of the person may just go into bad condition invisibly.

As the person grows old, all the health problems come out, sometimes one after another but quite often some come out simultaneouly. Health problems drag the person from good condition to bad, from bad to worse. from worse to the end of his journey in life.

So, do not play around with your health.

You say you are physically strong but health problem does not care about how strong you were, you are or you will be. Hence, just take good care of yourself for every second of your life.

It sounds impossible to take good care for every single second. Yes, it is difficult; however, one can not simply quit just because of the latent difficulty in doing the job. Otherwise, the person's life will be short perhaps it may be exciting too.

Even though we pursue excitement, surprised, amazement and other things that are challenging, we can't forget about our health. Remember that health is the most basal and as well as essential capital/wager when you are to "gamble".

Life is like a battery that needs to be taken good care of.

Cherish life and take good care of yourself.

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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Saturday, February 05, 2005

awful cough

"ke ke ke ke ke...."
i had some awful cough just now... i felt so bad and i nearly vomited... gosh...

how come my sickness is so serious this time???

perhaps it has been a long time since my last falling sick...

i just realize that i can't lie down after food... otherwise i will just cough terribly... it is really terrible... i can't stand the cough... it seems and sounds that i nealry cough all my guts out of my stomach to stop it... oh no....

anyway, i will take good care of myself... i am sitting right up now... i feel much better and the cough has receded... alright....

i am at my friends' room in TH... this is just a drop-by.... coz i went to Arts canteen to eat... he he... i had beef noodle @ the Chuan Restaunrant... he he... amazingly, i finished the bowel of noodles... he he...

it tasted really nice... yummy ... yummy...

gonna go back soon.... but i still have to wait till Monday morning for the delivery of my AC adapter... gosh...

have to wait..... wait... wait... on Monday i am going to see DR TAN again... hopefully, i'll be fine by then....

alright.... take care!
~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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comp down

oh... gosh... something really unexpected and surprising happened...

that is my laptop is down due to the failure of the AC adaptor... gosh... what can i do now???

i have called the IBM customer service and they have promised to send me a new AC adapor by monday morning... i cant do anything without my laptop...

i have so many things that need to be done with my laptop... i really cant stand the life without computer... i think computer has become part of modern people's life...

therefore, it is a necessity now for me... luckily, the problem is only about the adapter, or i really would have a big headache already...

argh.. yah...

i have been sick for almost 2 weeks... i feel much better now... but there is infection in my left lung... the doctor told me that it is pneumonia... i am not quite scared of it... coz i am recovering fast... but i still feel weak now and then... i cant do too much heavy exercise...

argh... just hope that i get well asap...

take care, friends.

~@££ tH3 !3esT~

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